Monday, February 9, 2015

Love is...

Love hurts, love scars, love hurts, ooh, love hurts

Those are words from a song my mom used to play over and over and over.  It was a song on one of her Everly Brothers records.  She would make us sing it with her over and over. 

It took me a long time to stop this song from replaying in my mind.  It took me a long time to figure out that the Everly Brothers and my mother were totally fucked up.  As a 40-year-old, I rebuke my mother's (and the Everly Brothers') version of love.  

Love means being vulnerable which can be scary, but there's more... 

Love can be scary.
So can stairs. Rufus can't quite get the guts to take the leap down the stairs, therefore he serves as the metaphor for this post--too afraid to leap for love.

Love can make us brave.  Brave enough to open ourselves up to fall in love and have the family and get the dog and buy the house and mess up and try again and have fights but then make up and be scared but then be comforted and take the pictures and cheer the kids on and worry about the bills and work hard and hug and reach out and dig deep and love more.

The love that I have makes me feel safe. It is unconditional, which is something I didn't truly understand until I met Tim and had my own children. It has taught me to face my fear of vulnerability and embrace authenticity. 

Love is messy, happy, busy, imperfect, funny, safe, nonjudgmental.

My love right now is an overnight camp, three basketball games, a bad back, two dogs, movie nights, breaking up sibling fights, helping with homework, reading stories, telling stories, making crafts, high-fiving, stressing about science fair, making family dinners and falling asleep watching a movie at night kind of weekend.  And I love it.

Two of the loves of my life.

This song from Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros is more my kind of song about love.  I've shared it before and I might share it again after today, because I love it. 

Click here to watch the video.


  1. god, i love that song. it's our family song too! sometimes i read your blog and think about how lucky your kids are to have you here, declaring love for them over and over. it's something they'll treasure later on. thanks for sharing your big heart with us! <3

  2. Oh, perfection. The sentiment and the photos.